Transfer, breakup, knockout. Believe me, nobody grazes better than us.
Folks, direct reactions. The greatest reactions. Tremendous cross sections. Beautiful angular distributions. I've been saying this for years. YEARS.
Some very dishonest people in the ab initio community. By the way, some of them are nice, some of them are not so nice. They said "It's over, Professor, direct reactions are DEAD." Dead! Can you believe it?
Let me tell you something. When I was at the nuclear physics conference. Huge crowd, by the way, biggest crowd they've ever seen. The fake news won't report it. A man came up to me, tears in his eyes, big strong guy, and he said "Professor, please. Please bring back (d,p)." And I said, "Sir, don't cry. We're gonna bring it back. Bigger. Stronger. More beautiful than ever."
And we ARE. We are doing it. Right now. As we speak. Believe me.
The BossDWBA. Distorted Wave Born Approximation. Four words. All WINNERS. Some people say "it's just a first order." First order? That's the BEST order. Everybody knows this.
On Reaction TheoryThey're doing ab initio calculations. A week on a supercomputer. A WEEK! I do it on a cocktail napkin in five minutes. Same answer. Better, actually. Much better.
On Computational EfficiencyThe optical potential is complex. And by complex, I mean TREMENDOUSLY complex. Real part, imaginary part. Both beautiful. Nobody does imaginary parts like we do.
On The Optical ModelCDCC. Four letters. Coupled. Discretized. Continuum. Channels. Every single letter is a WINNER. Best continuum you've ever seen. And we discretized it. Believe me.
On Coupled ChannelsSatchler. GREAT guy. Wrote a book this thick, folks, this thick, called Direct Nuclear Reactions. Nobody reads it anymore. SAD! They SHOULD read it. It's fantastic. Tremendous book.
On The ClassicsR-matrix theory. Wigner. Eisenbud. Lane. Thomas. All legends. All tremendous. And now? Crickets. Total disaster. We're gonna bring R-matrix BACK, folks. Bring it back BIG.
On R-MatrixThe collective model people. Very nice, very nice, I like them. BUT they've totally lost it. Lost it! Rotating. Vibrating. Pick a lane, folks. PICK A LANE.
On Collective ModelsThey're fitting three data points with a neural network. THREE! I could fit it with a RULER. A ruler, folks. And my ruler is better. Much better ruler.
On Machine Learning"We're gonna make (d,p) so great, (p,d) so tremendous, (α,α′) so beautiful, you're gonna get tired of winning. You're gonna come to me and say, 'Professor, please, enough winning.' And I'll say: NEVER."